"I don't want one single person to miss out on documenting these things." she shared.
Losing a parent can be awful. It's even worse when it's unexpected and you have an especially close relationship with them. That's what happened to a Tennessee mother, Courtney Lopez Gervais, when her mother's untimely passing almost broke her. She is now sharing what she wishes she had asked her mother, in the hopes of inspiring others to ask their mothers the same questions while they are still alive.
Gervais told Good Morning America that the five questions occurred to her in a dream after her mother, Kathy Medrow, died of melanoma in 2021, aged 50. "In my dream this time, I knew that she wasn't going to make it and I accepted that. And so, I was in a hurry writing, making a list of all the things I wanted from her before it was her time," the 33-year-old recalled. "I don't want one single person to miss out on documenting these things. I promise you, they'll mean a lot one day," Gervais wrote.
Gervais and her mother were "very close" and had the "strongest bond," but she couldn't pass that relationship on to her kids, a 2-year-old daughter, a 9-month-old son, and a stepdaughter. So she emphasized having her kids know her mother's handwriting.
Gervais shared that she still didn't know certain specifics her mom would have wanted to share with her own children, and that's why she wants people to ask their mothers for details on what they expect their grandkids' lives to turn out like.
"I wish I would have spent more time being inquisitive about her and her childhood," Gervais said. "She was just so interested in me and supporting me and being my biggest cheerleader. I wish that I just would have spent more time learning truly about who she was and what made her the way that she [was]," which is why she wants people to ask their moms to share the bits from their childhoods.
Explaining the importance of this question, Gervais, wrote in the caption, "I know she was proud of me, but I wish I knew which exact moments were her favorite. When her heart swelled with joy like mine does for my children." She admitted she is still grieving nearly two years after her mother's untimely death, and she felt it was important to see things from her mother's perspective.
"What she wants to leave to them (a piece of jewelry, a special dish, custom art) and why it’s important to her," she explained.
A comment Gervais shared perfectly summarizes the need for this list of questions. "One person commented and said that she has stage four terminal cancer, which is ultimately what my mom had, but in her message, she said, 'It's treatable but not curable and essentially, thanks to this video, you've inspired me to leave some of these things for my children and grandchildren'," Gervais recalled. "I was so touched by that response and that's just so beautiful to me because that's exactly what I want people to be able to do -- because you don't really know what you're going to want or miss until it happens."
Representative Cover Image Source: Pixabay | Image by Gisela Merkuur