When they say your body can talk, they aren't wrong. And especially when it comes to how you are with your partner, what your body "says" can reveal a lot about your relationship.
Editor’s note: This article was originally published on October 15, 2020. It has since been updated.
Words alone cannot express the way we feel about someone. It's all about that feeling that spreads through your body just being around that special person. It's about that connection you share with them without breathing a single syllable. It speaks its own language. And it is that very body language that can reveal just how strong your relationship is. It's especially when you do these things, it shows the depth of your bond with your partner.
According to Laurel House, a dating and relationship expert, when you mimic the body language of your partner, it's a sign of a strong relationship. "While you can create the synchronicity, with connected couples it often happens naturally," she says, according to Martha Stewart Weddings. "Just as two people might yawn together, a subconscious sign that there is a connection, or desire for a connection, mirroring body language makes individuals feel not alone."
It's almost a second instinct to want to be physically close to your partner. But it's more than that too. Whether it's holding hands, arms on their shoulders or even hands on your partner's back all of it can reveal just how much of a bond you share with them. “This isn’t something all couples do,” says couples therapist Terri Orbuch, Ph.D, according to Women's Health Mag. “Touch symbolizes intimacy, emotional closeness and happiness in a relationship.” So watch out. If your partner doesn't hold your hand, because it could indicate that the bond isn't very strong.
Eyes are the window to the soul and it's true. When you truly love someone, it shines in your eyes. "Sometimes it's a lingering look as the looker gets lost in the moment, and other times it's just a few moments that say so much," says House. "If you're standing on opposite sides of the room and lock eyes you're immediately connected—like a moment in a sci-fi movie, time seems to freeze, and so do all of your surroundings."
You lean into your partner when you are genuinely interested in what they want to say. "Leaning away means you may be disinterested in connecting with your partner while leaning your upper body toward your partner and lining up your face with theirs shows that you totally adore them," Dr. Mercer explains. It's also a sign of trust according to Dr. Orbuch, especially when you lay your head on their shoulder. “I feel close to you, I trust you, I want to be close to you," she says. "You’re leaning on someone you trust and may want to be comforted by.”
Lingering kisses are a sign of healthy relationships. "Kissing is obviously intimate, but depending on how you and your partner do it, it can mean different things for couples. For example, kissing on the lips is the most intimate," says Dr. Mercer. "Importantly, there's a difference between a peck on the lips that you might give a first-date partner or family member."
An open palm is an indication of an open mind. When it comes to your partner, keeping your palms open when they're talking indicates a willingness to truly listen to what they're saying. Jacob Kountz, marriage and family therapist trainee says that"research has found that showing the palms of our hands during conversation displays openness, honesty, and directness. Basically, the things most people search for in a strong relationship," he added. "Moreover, it's also good to pay close attention to hand gestures while they are speaking—for instance, if they are using hand gestures while speaking and it doesn't seem exaggerated, chances are they are doing their best to be warm and direct with you."