Love and attraction are both important to your relationship. But the latter seems to have gone out the window lately.
Editor’s note: This article was originally published on May 24, 2019. It has since been updated.
Flowers. Romantic dates. Soft kisses on the neck. These were just some of the things he used to do that made the spark between you two flare bright and strong. You could just look at each other and you would feel tingles running down your spine, igniting something far hotter. Your love was all-encompassing.
But now, gone are the days where it was all about stolen glances, whispered words, and fluttering touches. Now, with both of you having settled into a comfortable, warm routine, you feel safe and stable with him. He still makes you feel good with all the small things he does for you. After years of being together, the love is still as strong as before.
But the spark... It's gone.
Here are some signs that prove that while he's still in love with you, he's just not attracted to you anymore.
Every woman wants their man to be their partner as well as their best friend. Lately though, it's all about doing the chores, discussing the bills and running errands. It's like he's more of a best friend and roommate than a partner. Even in other conversations, the flirty banter that would once make its appearance every now and then, has now gone missing.
You used to debate a lot, and those arguments for argument's sake would rile the two of you up just enough to spark a heated make-up sex session. Now, the two of you are so in sync that you sometimes wonder if you should argue a little sometimes. Not that you don't engage in great conversations anymore; you still do. But he sees your point rather easily than he used to. It's not a bad thing, of course. You just miss the occasional argument.
Earlier, together time meant lots of sexy time. Lately, it's been all about love, safety, and warmth. The emotional intimacy is soaring through the roof, but the physical intimacy has taken a nose dive. The hugs and touches you share are comforting, just not the type that can have your body tingling. It takes more of an effort to create that sexy time now.
Every woman, no matter her age, loves to be pampered by her man. And that's what he did for you in the beginning. Weekend trips together, suddenly running through the rain... there's none of that anymore. The spontaneity that gave you both memories to cherish is gone. While you know he clearly still loves you, it's almost as if he's happier just staying in this stable life, with nothing to disrupt it. He views you as his partner but doesn't think of having fun with you perhaps.
Date nights, period chocolates, anniversary flowers... all those small things that made you feel special have gone missing from your life. He doesn't really do any of that anymore. These days, he's more about helping you around the house and with the kids. While you love that about him, you wish he'd put in a little effort to make the relationship feel like it did in the beginning.
You're probably not the first on his contact list anymore. What with the two of you living together and all, the number of phone calls you make to each other is bound to take a dip. However, earlier, he used to call you during lunch breaks just for a quick chat to know how you're doing. Lately though, unless it's about paying an overdue bill or what he needs to buy for groceries, he doesn't call you. Phone calls have become strictly functional; no fun and frolic there.
