“We woke up and we just shook hands like, ‘I love you, but it's time to sleep divorce,'" said Daly.
While a married couple sharing a bed is normal, some people need their personal space while sleeping. To share a bed with someone else in such scenarios may be very difficult.
During such times, it's best to sleep separately. But it is frowned upon quite a lot, because a married couple is supposed to stick together, no matter what. However, TODAY host Carson Daly opened up about going through a ‘sleep divorce’ and said it was the best thing to happen to him and his wife.
Daly and his wife, Siri Daly, started sleeping in separate bedrooms while she was pregnant with their fourth child, Goldie, who was born on March 26, 2020. “I was served my sleep-divorce papers a few years ago,” he explained. “It’s the best thing that ever happened to us. We both, admittedly, slept better apart.”
“We're both pretty good-sized humans and it just wasn't really working when she was in her third trimester, and I also have sleep apnea, which is very sexy for the ladies out there, I'm sure,” Carson told PEOPLE at the time. “She couldn't get comfortable, so we were like a commercial you would see, kicking each other and just not sleeping.
So, they came up with a creative solution that worked for both. “We woke up and we just shook hands like, ‘I love you, but it's time to sleep divorce. It'll be the best thing for all of us,’” Daly said, and that’s what they’ve been doing since. https://t.co/5oYritXHIu
— Fatherly (@FatherlyHQ) June 27, 2022
“We woke up and we just shook hands like, ‘I love you, but it's time to sleep divorce. It'll be the best thing for all of us,’” he added.
Wendy M. Troxel Ph.D., a behavioral and social scientist known for her work on sleep and health, spoke about how putting your relationship first is actually a good idea.
“Here’s what the science tells us about the costs and benefits of sleeping together or apart. When sleep is measured objectively, people sleep worse with a partner. In fact, if you sleep with someone who snores, you can blame them for up to 50 percent of your sleep disruptions,” she wrote for TED Ideas.
Someone suffering from sleep deprivation also prefers sleeping with their partner fearing what others may say about them sleeping alone. They may also have the need to be near their partner. “This suggests that our social brain is prioritizing our need for closeness and security at night—even when it comes at a cost to our sleep,” she wrote.
Sleeping apart isn’t always a sign of relationship issues. Just the opposite. My feature with @InsideHook shares ‘sleep divorce’ as a key to @CarsonDaly’s marriage success. #sleepdivorce #marriage #sleepingapart #celebritynewshttps://t.co/BaoGrURaVC
— Susan Winter (@susan_e_winter) July 3, 2022
But getting a good night’s sleep is most important even if that means sleeping in separate beds or in separate rooms. “Just as sleeping together doesn’t guarantee a successful relationship—if only it were that easy!—sleeping apart doesn’t doom you to an unsuccessful one,” Troxel added.
A sleep divorce is not the end of your marriage. If anything making sleep a priority will only make things better and stronger. Now you know what to do if you're suffering from a bad night's sleep because of your partner.
References:
https://www.today.com/health/sleep/sleep-divorce-rcna35021
Cover Image Source: Getty Images | Photo by Matt Winkelmeyer / Staff