Duane "Dog" Chapman broke down several times while speaking about his beloved wife, who passed away on June 26. The Colorado memorial was attended by thousands of people and live-streamed as well.
Friends, family, and fans gathered for the last time to say goodbye to Beth Chapman. Her husband, Dog the bounty hunter, teared up multiple times on July 13 while speaking at her Colorado memorial. He is still grieving and devastated at his loss. Earlier, he had said that even though he is called upon to make serious decisions he had been unable to do so. He has been forced to come to terms with the loss and yet every morning he wakes up not remembering she's really gone.
The event was open to the public as well as live-streamed for the fans who couldn't come for it. At the Heritage Christian Center in Aurora, Dog Chapman spoke for almost 30 minutes and poured his heart out.
“I cannot believe that she’s gone,” he said, according to People. “This is not possible, I want to wake up from a dream," he said in his calming voice. He was dressed in pink to honor his partner. “In the ’70s, I did 18 months in the Texas penitentiary and I told God yesterday I’d do five years, ten years day to day just to kiss her again. I never felt like this," he said.
His wife had been battling stage II throat cancer since 2017 and passed away on June 26 at the age of 51. “She will never be dead to me. She is in another place,” Dog said. “I’m gonna get to heaven and make her so proud. She’s gonna say like she said here, ‘That’s my man right there, that’s big daddy right there.'"
He also spoke about Beth's last day while she was struggling through filming their upcoming show, Dog's Most Wanted.
Our hearts are breaking for Dog the Bounty Hunter as he exclusively reveals to ET how he's processing the death of his wife, Beth Chapman. 💔 Tonight on ET. pic.twitter.com/MhnYtnAHl7— Entertainment Tonight (@etnow) July 11, 2019
“She’d gotten sick, they told her she got cancer. They said she could do chemo though, they said she would have to sit at home while Dog films the show. The show did not kill her but she died for it,” said Dog, who called Beth their “angelic drone in the air now.”
“She said, ‘Do you think I’m going to let you go out by yourself and film this TV show? You’re out of your mind.’ I said, ‘Honey you might have to do chemo and stuff,’ ” Dog recalled. "She goes, ‘All it’ll do is keep me alive six months longer and I’m not going to do that because I want to be by your side.’ She would tell these guys on the show, ‘You’re trying to die doing these drugs and I’m trying to live.’ Those guys started bawling and crying,” he continued.
The big guy was emotional as he said that he "never admitted that she was going to die" and neither would he let her say it, according to E! News. Beth had asked him once how he was going to go on without her and to that he said, "And I don't know," he said. "I don't right now."
In her last days, she asked him to let her go and he just said, "I can't". "I'm not going to let you go,'" he recalled. "I still haven't let her go."
Not wanting to live long without her he said, "If there is a God, He won't let me live that long without her." The Chapman patriarch added that she is simply in another place and not dead to him. "Everything she taught me, I'm going to get to Heaven," he said. "I am going to make her so proud."
The patriarch had earlier revealed that grief has taken away his will to eat as well. He lost 17 pounds in two weeks, he told Entertainment Online. "I can't eat. Two bites, I'm full. I got to force-feed myself like I force-fed her," he admitted. He also admitted that he is "ready to go", indicating that he doesn't have any will to go on living after his loss.
The patriarch of the family added that he left her belongings exactly as they were in the wardrobe. He was planning to split them among his daughters.
“I walked through the closet the other day and I smell her,” he tearfully said. “Then this morning, I could smell her. I said, ‘Is it okay if I keep the closet like that?’” he shared. A loved one told him, “Until you die, that closet is staying the same.”
He had some advice for those in relationships. “If you’re beefin’ with your old lady, stop and kiss her right now. Because you’re gonna feel so bad when he or her are not with you anymore,” he said. “It is one of the worst feelings a man or woman could ever have. I’m telling you,” he shared. “I’ve never felt this bad, I’m sad. I didn’t want to do a celebration of life because I’m sad. I miss her so much.”
“I’ve never imagined I would lose my mom at 20. I never imagined walking down the aisle without her or her not judging my dress. I never imagined a life without her, it’s really tough now being without her,” her 20-year old daughter said. “I lost my rock. I never imagined having to write a speech like this, to the most beautiful woman who ever lived. I would never lose footage of my mother, there will always be another video, another episode, another clip,” she shared.
i just watched beth chapman’s daughter say her final speech about her and when i tell you i cried.....i balled cried!!! i can only feel the pain & sadness she’s feeling😭😭❤️— JEREMY (@Keaukahi_) July 13, 2019
“I’m so thankful she was able to share her life and our family’s life with all of you. The world isn’t going to be the same without my mother. My family has been so tough, my father has been doing an amazing job. Beth Chapman will never be forgotten and I can say that with confidence," she added.