Keeping the passion alive between the sheets is important in a relationship, and how you both like it in bed can actually reveal a lot about your couple dynamics.
When you're in a long-term relationship, sometimes sex becomes low on priority. With children, work, and other responsibilities, we start compromising on the passion department. However, if you have been wondering whether you should have more sex, don't be fooled by what you see on TV.
In 2015, researchers had revealed that after a 40-year study that surveyed more than 30,000 Americans, they found that couples that have sex once a week are the happiest. So, don't worry if you are one of those people. The quality of sex matters and how it makes you feel. If you are satisfied with once a week, then that's your magic number.
Sex positions are another matter that people like to debate about. Whether it is good, who does it satisfy more, is it the right one for conceiving, or if it induces excitement are some of the questions that are raised about sex positions. There is one more aspect that the choice of your sex position gives away: the state of your relationship.
This is what your go-to sex position reveals about your relationship:
Not only are you romantic in your daily lives but you also love to spice it up in bed. The relationship has love and passion equally. Not only is it satisfying for the man, but he can also reach around and play with your clit. It adds to the excitement. As a couple, your favorite way to spend time might actually be in the bedroom. Sex and intimacy are innately connected for you and the post-sex high stays with you for the rest of the day probably, according to Elle Australia. However, if this is the only position you want to try, where you can't see each other's face at all, something could be up. Maintaining eye-contact is said to be one of the best ways to deepen the bond between you and your partner, and if you are avoiding that, it could spell a lack of intimacy.
While the missionary often gets dubbed as boring, it can be a great way to connect with your partner. You can gaze into each other's eyes, kiss on the mouth and neck, and have tons of skin-to-skin contact. It is a very intimate position. If you opt for this every time though, you could be giving away a lot of control to the man.
Try being creative and mix-it-up. Try the split-missionary, where your legs are spread into a split. “Split missionary ups the ante and makes it easy to enjoy some of the deepest penetration possible,” Anne Hodder, a multi-certified sex educator, tells Health.
If this is your go-to position, then you like lots of skin-to-skin contact. This is a cuddly and intimate position, which shows that the couple is comfortable with each other. Maybe, a little too comfortable? You might love the cozy-ness but once in a while hit the town, says Your Tango.
"It also creates a very different sensation for both partners,” says Hodder. In this position, your shoulders, back, and butt are close to your partner's torso and he can easily caress your breasts or clitoris. “It’s also great for people who find standing or kneeling positions too painful or uncomfortable for their bodies,” Hodder adds. It doesn't require a lot of physical effort either.
Your partner knows that you're the commander of this relationship. You drive it forward and you have the reigns. You're the dominant one and your partner lets you know that by treating you like a queen. He prioritizes your satisfaction just as much as his. This relationship is full of trust and comfort and you don't feel that you have to let yourself shine less bright just to feed his ego.
If having an orgasm is a tricky part for you and oral sex is the only thing that works, it's okay. If he loves to finish in your mouth, and you're okay with it, that's fine too. As long as both of you have discussed this and are comfortable, there is no harm in trying different things in bed. After all, oral sex can probably bring you closer than the penetrative sex. However, if you're the only one going down on him and he never offers, there are problems you need to discuss.