Not being able to reach an orgasm no matter how hard you try can hamper your quality of life and wellbeing. Turns out, it's an actual medical condition that can be caused by physical as well as psychological factors.
Despite ample stimulation and no matter how in the mood you are, not reaching an orgasm or severe difficulty in reaching one can be frustrating. Many times, the blame falls on the partner for not trying hard enough, but in some cases, it could be an actual medical condition. Yes, we are talking about anorgasmia. Significant sexual dissatisfaction can arise from a medical condition like this, according to the National Center for Biotechnology Information (NCBI).
About 11-41 percent of women across the world can be affected by a Female Orgasmic Disorder (FOD) like this. And this can also affect your general health, well-being and quality of life.
Naturally, it doesn't call for concern if you don't reach an orgasm occasionally after being sexually stimulated. Some women also find that they reach orgasm with only specific types of stimulation. But when it is a persistent problem that is increasing your dissatisfaction, it could be an orgasmic disorder. They are mostly caused by psychological factors, according to the Encyclopedia of Mental Disorders. Even the lack of or improper communication with your partner or spouse could be behind it.
Roughly 1 in 10 women do not reach an orgasm, as reported by the Merck Manual, but most women are generally satisfied with their sexual activity or pleasure. It would only be a reason for you to approach a doctor about it if you find that even if you are masturbating or even when you are significantly aroused sexually, but still don't have an orgasm.
Both physical and psychological factors can cause anorgasmia in women.
Certain illnesses or physiological changes in your body could give rise to this medical condition. Ailments like Parkinson's disease, multiple sclerosis, and their consequent effects on your mind and body can prevent you from reaching orgasm, according to Mayo Clinic. Taking certain medications like those for blood pressure, antipsychotic drugs, antihistamines, and antidepressants can also cause this. If your previous gynecological history includes a hysterectomy or surgeries for cancer, this too can affect your orgasm.
Habits like drinking excessive alcohol or smoking can also prevent you from reaching an orgasm; alcohol can get in the way of your body's ability to climax while smoking reduces the blood that reaches your sexual organs. Another factor that could give rise to this condition is your age. As you age and start experiencing menopausal symptoms, the changes that happen in your body can get in the way of your regular orgasms.
A lot of your sexual pleasure is dependent on the frame of mind that you are in. If your mind is not at ease, it can stop you from reaching an orgasm. According to the International Society for Sexual Medicine (ISSM), if you're anxious about having sex or about how sex might be, it could be the cause behind an orgasmic disorder like this. With stress on your mind or worries about the relationship between you and your partner, you are likely to feel incapable of enjoying sexual pleasure fully.
If you are uncomfortable with the idea of sex, you have negative opinions about it or you feel guilty about having sexual activities, it can stop you from enjoying sex or having an orgasm. Other factors like not having enough experience or the wrong timing or the wrong setting can also hamper your chances of reaching climax.
There are certain things that you can try on your own to see whether it will help you reach an orgasm. If there is anything that is troubling your mind, about yourself or your relationship or sex in general, that could be the root cause to tackle first. Try to have open conversations with your partner and build more trust and intimacy between both of you.
You and your partner can also find ways to make the setting or the environment more appropriate for arousal. Let your partner know what feels more exciting for you or other ideas that you both might be open to.
If nothing seems to work, you are growing increasingly dissatisfied about your sexual activity, and it's severely hampering your quality of life and wellbeing, then it's best to seek professional help. A doctor will be able to suggest other treatments or methods that could help you erase the problem that's stopping you from reaching an orgasm.