"I miss being a part of their lives and them being part of mine," he admits.
Editor's note: This article was originally published on December 17, 2021. It has since been updated.
Despite reportedly being one of the kindest and most grounded celebrities in the industry, Keanu Reeves has experienced grief like no other. His childhood was marred by experiences that left a deep and lasting impact on him, and it all started with his dad walking out on his mom when he was just three years old. He's lost his close friend to drugs and has seen his sister struggle with cancer.
However, he grew up to be a successful star and even found love. The first time, it was when he first met Jennifer Syme, who was David Lynch's assistant at the time. Reeves said they "fell instantly in love." A year into their relationship, Reeves was over the moon when he found out that Syme was pregnant with their first child, a daughter. They had even picked out a name for her-Ava Archer Symes-Reeves.
Unfortunately, eight months into the pregnancy, the baby was stillborn. It happened on Christmas Eve, and her mom battled with post-natal depression after her and Reeves' devastating loss. The couple experienced immeasurable amounts of grief which drove them apart, forcing them to ultimately end their relationship.
However, the couple were still in touch with each other privately and had a bond. They apparently got back together, but they only got to spend very little time together. Two years after losing their child, Syme passed away in a car crash. She had attended a party at the home of Marilyn Manson. A guest at the party drove her to her house before dawn, News.com.au
She was buried next to their stillborn daughter in Westwood Village Memorial Park Cemetery.
At times, he also thinks about how his present life would be had all his loved ones were alive. "I miss being a part of their lives and them being part of mine," he admits. "I wonder what the present would be like if they were here - what we might have done together. I miss all the great things that will never be. Damn it! It's not fair! It's absurd."
"All you can do is hope that grief will be transformed and, instead of feeling pain and confusion you will be together again in memory, that there will be solace and pleasure there, not just loss," said the actor.
Even though it was a long time ago, the actor still carries the grief of it around, but he has since found love in Alexandra Grant.
A source told Life & Style in 2019, “Keanu was so traumatized by [Jennifer Syme’s] death that there were times when he couldn’t get out of bed in the morning,” but “everything changed” when he met Grant.
“He was in such a dark place for so long, but Alexandra’s positive outlook and support have played a huge part in helping him turn his life around,” the insider explained.
Though Reeves and Grant tend to keep their private life tightly under wraps, they seem to be happy. After all, happiness is all that matters, right?
Cover Image Source: Getty Images | Photo by Jamie McCarthy