"There is no simple answer to balancing anything," the mom-of-two says as she uses humor to deal with it.
Kristen Bell may have starred in Bad Moms as Kiki who tries her best to be a perfect mom but reaches her breaking point and decides to become a "bad mom." However, in real life, the actress is not too unlike the character she plays in the movie when it comes to being the perfect parent.
In an interview with Parents on a Facebook live chat, the mother-of-two opened up about attempting to find a balance between being a career woman, a wife and especially a hands-on mom to her daughters, Delta and Lincoln whom she shares with hubby, Dax Shepherd. In response to a question about how she handles all of it together, she replied, "There is no simple answer to balancing anything." It takes a positive attitude and some patience to work through the toughest parts of motherhood, she believes.
"Nothing good comes out of my negativity," she added. "If that means leaving the room when your kids are driving you nuts, great! Then do it." And like many other moms, she agonizes over how to be the perfect parent. But while we strive for that, the 39-year-old mentions that in this obsession, we forget to take care of ourselves. "I find a balance by really prioritizing myself," she said. In order to do that, she enlists the help of Shepherd by switching the kids out with him. Considering the fact that both of them work full-time, by taking turns with the kids, it makes it easier for the two of them.
As much as she loves her kids and does her best to keep them out of the spotlight, she knows that motherhood can be tough as well. In an interview with Us Weekly, she revealed what the hardest part about being a mom was — the lack of sleep. “I think that fuels everything,” the Frozen actress said. “It fuels my lack of patience with my kids sometimes. If I had had a full night’s rest, I would be able to be more patient with them sometimes.”
“My current alarm clock is the blood-curdling screams that I wake up to,” she joked. “I bolt down the hallway thinking that someone’s fallen out of their crib or broken their arm or, I don’t know, drowning in the sink, and then they’re just like ‘Good morning, Mommy!’” So when she feels completely drained, she lets her husband know that she needs a break.
“There’s no trick to doing it, other than having really good communication with your partner and being able to say, ‘I’m reaching capacity. So I need to go take a hike today,’ or ‘I need to go have lunch with a girlfriend,’” Bell said. She also opens up about having to deal with the depression and anxiety that comes with the role and that laughter helps her get through those difficult moments.
"Every day is something comical," The Good Place star told Today. "Every day when you're raising kids, you feel like you could cry or crack up and just scream 'This is ridiculous!' because there's so much nonsense, whether it's what they're saying to you or the fact that there's avocado or poop on every surface." She also has some advice for moms who struggle with the same worry about what kind of parent they're being.
She believes that the moment you start judging yourself as a parent, you'll make yourself miserable and exhausted. The key to greater happiness, as she says, is putting an end to "mommy wars," whether it's within yourself of with other mothers. "If you walk out of your house worried that people will judge you, you will feel judged," she shared with Today. "You are setting an expectation that will be inevitable. But there are so many moms and so many people out there who are done with that game of picking sides and having stereotypes and feeling like we're at war with each other. I choose not to label myself under any circumstance. I'm not a good mom; I'm not a bad mom. I'm the mom I am and I try very hard, and when I fail, that's OK."
After all, moms are human beings who deserve to take care of themselves and do what feels right as well. So don't judge yourself. You raised your kids to the best of your ability and the fact that you survived it without giving in to the pressures, proves just how much hidden strength you have. And that is in addition to pushing a small human out of your womb... multiple times. So give yourself a break and don't forget to engage in a little self-care.