"I do find that women who come up to me and say, 'I'm a breast cancer survivor,' they almost invariably tell me the same story, and that is that they put themselves last in the long line of people they took care of, not only emotionally but physically."
At times, we don't realize that the painful experiences that we go through might actually be blessings in disguise. And that is what American musician and actress, Sheryl Crow realized after going through both a painful breakup and fighting a life-threatening condition that drained her both emotionally, and physically.
When Crow met and started dating famous cyclist, Lance Armstrong in 2003, she was ecstatic. She believed that she had found the right partner with whom she could share the rest of her life with. Three years later, when he popped the big question, she was over the moon. But she had no idea their engagement wasn't going to last very long.
A mere five months after asking the C'mon C'mon singer to marry him, the athlete decided to call it quits, leaving her heartbroken.
However, before she really had time to grieve for her broken relationship, Sheryl Crow was hit with more shocking news — she was diagnosed with breast cancer. And it got worse when she had an audience. “When I was diagnosed and my relationship fell apart, people were camped outside trying to get that picture of Sheryl Crow at her lowest moment. I just lost all faith in humankind,” said Crow, according to People.
It wasn't easy to come back from all that she was going through. While fighting for her life through chemotherapy, she had to mourn the death of her relationship too. It was a physical and emotional challenge for her. "It is like a death, you know. And in many ways it's like having part of your life amputated, but you still have that phantom itch, you know, where you wake up and I'll see something and think, 'Oh, I've got to make sure Lance is hip to this band. I've got to put it on his iPod.' And then I remember, 'Oh, wait, you know, that's not my life.'," she said, according to ABC News.
However, she found the strength deep inside her and knew something had to change. And that change had to start with her.
“... I licked my wounds. I started feeling like, ‘I’m at a point in my life where I need to manifest something more realistic.'," she told People. Not only did she manage to win the battle against cancer, but she also began to find what really made her happy. The nine-time Grammy-winning musician took to heart a lesson she learned while undergoing treatment — to put herself first.
"I do find that women who come up to me and say, 'I'm a breast cancer survivor,' they almost invariably tell me the same story, and that is that they put themselves last in the long line of people they took care of, not only emotionally but physically."
"I think I was definitely guilty of that. Part of my challenge with being diagnosed was to put myself first, to learn how to say no, and to learn how to listen to my body when it came to exhaustion, and to not take care of everyone. To actually put my oxygen mask on before I put anybody else's on in order to save my own life," she added, according to MSN.
Crow went on to adopt two sons, moved to Los Angeles and kick-started her musical career again. “Now I have a place to come home to. I feel like everything in your life presents itself as a means of helping you remember who you are. There are so many times along the way that you forget who you are, and that’s when you find yourself the loneliest,” said the 57-year-old artist.
“Now I drop my kids off in the school drop-off lane, I pick them up after school, and I’m perfectly content. I feel so much more alive and young than I even felt in the 20 years of living in L.A. I love my life."
Though she is perfectly content with her children and her music, this woman who was reborn as a survivor, hasn't given up on love. “I’m not dating right now, but I tell all my friends, ‘Set me up.’ They’re like, ‘We don’t know anybody good enough,’ and I keep saying, ‘Lower your standards!'” said Crow in another interview with People. She's even open to the idea of marriage. “I would love [to get married]," said the If It Makes You Happy singer, "But I don’t think it’s the end-all, be-all. Being well-loved and loving someone is what it’s about. And that’s another area that’s just priceless to be able to model to your kids. So if it isn’t that, then I don’t want it around them."
Sheryl Crow has found happiness and fulfillment and it doesn't seem like it'll change any time soon. Cheers to her and any woman who has had to physically and emotionally rise from the ashes.
References:
https://people.com/music/sheryl-crow-found-happiness-after-cancer-lance-armstrong-breakup/
https://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Entertainment/story?id=2159040&page=1
https://www.msn.com/en-us/health/wellness/sheryl-crow-says-the-most-difficult-part-of-breast-cancer-treatment-was-putting-herself-first/ar-AAIxFbl
https://people.com/music/sheryl-crow-isnt-dating-open-to-marriage/
