5 Signs a Relationship May Not Survive the 7-Year-Itch

5 Signs a Relationship May Not Survive the 7-Year-Itch

Some people might think that it's a myth, but they are the lucky ones. There are many couples who head separate ways around that period of their relationship.

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People in long-term relationships might be aware of the term seven-year-itch. For some, it's a fearful time and for others, it might not even feel real. But, is it real? Some experts say it is around this time that people start questioning their relationships and they begin to re-evaluate their decisions. So, relationships are likely going to get rocky around this time. At the other end of this tunnel, people might realize that either their relationship isn't working or that they are satisfied.


"The seven-year-itch is real," author and life coach Jaya Jaya Myra tells Bustle. "Just ask any of your married (or divorced) friends." She added that people get bogged down by the little things than the big problems. "The tendency to separate at or around the seven-year mark has much more to do with little things not being right than one major big problem," she said. "Maybe seven years is the threshold for our psyche to deal with lots of those little irritations before we finally get fed up," she added.


Many celebrities, like Brad Pitt, Kelly Clarkson, Kim Kardashian, Jennifer Lopez, and others, have called it quits around this time in their relationships. So, is there a way to know if your relationship won't go past that due date?

Yes, here are some signs that will tell you if your relationship won't make it:

1. You live separate lives 

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Communication is an important part of a couple's life. Without it, a relationship can buckle under pressure. When we don't focus on this aspect, it can feel like we are leading separate lives. If we don't know what makes our partner happy, stressed, sad, and we don't bother finding out, the relationship might start feeling very disconnected. Caleb Backe, Health and Wellness Expert for Maple Holistics, tells Bustle, "Make time for each other, speak with each other, and express your needs as they present themselves."


2. You keep things to yourself 

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All of us have the right to keep some things to ourselves but in many working relationships, our partner knows most things about us. However, when we stop feeling comfortable sharing details about our life, the relationship can be headed in the wrong direction. It could be that we don't trust our partner anymore, but being honest with them will also prompt them to be the same with us as well.


3. Both of you don't compromise 

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It is difficult to compromise. Nobody likes to do it but we still do it to make our relationships work. It is an important part of our relationship and that's how we attain balance. When both partners refuse to compromise, it can cause a gap between them. "A relationship is about listening to each other and helping one another feel comfortable in the relationship," Benjamin Ritter, founder of the Breakup Supplement and consultant for Live for Yourself Consulting, tells Elite Daily. "If one partner stops trying to compromise and understand the other, the relationship isn't working anymore."


4. You feel negative around them 

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To live our best possible lives, we should surround ourselves with positives. However, when your partner, the most important person in our life, makes us feel negative, it could be that something is not working in the relationship. "A relationship should be a positive force in your life, most of the time," Elle Huerta, CEO and founder of heartbreak recovery app Mend, tells Elite Daily. "Rocky patches are inevitable, but on the whole, a relationship shouldn't make you feel insecure, sad, angry, stuck, or confused," she added.


5. You don't have "couple time" 

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One of the best ways to reconnect with each other is by spending time together but if that has not been happening or if you intentionally avoid it, then your relationship might not make it past the 7-year-itch. "If you have children, make it a point to (at least twice a year) take a vacation from them," Kathryn Smerling, a psychotherapist currently serving as a clinical instructor at Mount Sinai, tells RedbookMag. "You can really appreciate each other when the kids are not around. Even if you can't take a vacation, have a relative or friend watch them for a weekend and take a 'staycation.' Do something physical together. Rent a bike, go hiking, go for a run — exercise is an incredibly bonding experience," she added.





Cover image source: Getty Images | Photo by PhotoAlto/Frederic Cirou