Though they separated in 2017, they are still pretty "close", says DeVito and still love each other.
Relationships are complicated, especially marriages. It is the coming together of two people from different backgrounds, with many differences in experiences as there are similarities. So, when a couple decides to part permanently, they would make the boundary clear by going for a divorce. But not Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman.
Despite their separation, they have decided that they will never get divorced, said Rhea Perman. According to PEOPLE, she said this in 2019 on Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen. "But, I’m not getting divorced," she added. "No, no, no. What for? We do live separately. We see each other a lot too."
Continuing, she said, "It’s not in his face or in mine. It was a hard transition... but everything smoothed out," she explained. "Everybody’s got a good relationship with Danny, and with me and each other. That’s all we care about."
During the conversation, a fan asked the Poms actress why it was easy for her and DeVito to remain friends. She said, "I don’t know why it’s difficult for other people, but Danny and I have always loved each other and we have three amazing children together," Perlman said. "We really agree on almost everything important."
She continued, “You know, we were together for 40 years. 40 years is a long time, you might have to do something else!” When Cohen asked her how often they keep in touch, Perlman said, “A lot. We talked today.” The anchor also asked her about her relationship with DeVito now, as compared to earlier and she said it was “much better because all the tense stuff is gone.”
Even DeVito said, “We’re friends. We’re happy. Everybody’s happy.” PEOPLE that he and Perlman, now 72, have remained “very close.” As recently as March 2020, the two were spotted having dinner in Los Angeles as per Daily Mail.
They first announced their separation in October 2012. The rumored reason for their split is DeVito's roving eye, according to Radar Online. The couple’s good friend, actor Michael Douglas, did his part to try and get them back together. A source told Radar Online that "Michael loves Rhea and he told Danny he will never find another woman quite like her. They complement each other perfectly and are the best of friends."
Continuing, the source said, “He said he should do whatever it takes to win Rhea back and come to his senses fast before it is too late. It’s because of Michael they are talking to each other. They are still trying to work things out, and for the moment they are just good friends, but they are heading in the right direction." The couple later reconciled in March 2013, before finally separating in 2017.
But none of this takes away from the fact that the couple spent a whopping 40 years together, out of which they were married for 30. According to Cheatsheet, DeVito and Perman met in 1971. They had a whirlwind romance, with the two of them moving in together mere weeks after meeting.
Talking about how they met, the FRIENDS and Seinfeld actor once said, “I was in a play off-Broadway, at the Mercury Theater, and I was playing this demented stable boy, I’m sitting on the edge of the stage, spitting into the orchestra pit. The young girl, who I was having my way with [in the play], the landowner’s daughter, comes out and she says, ‘Richie, what are you doing?’ I said, ‘I’m spittin’ on the swans.’ She was Rhea’s girlfriend, Rhea came to see the show, and Rhea saw me.”
DeVito revealed that after the show, they “hung out a little bit.” “I really dug her,” he said on Live with Regis and Kathie Lee in 1996. Perlman, who was there during the interview agreed the feeling was mutual. “We were instant,” she said. “We spent all night talking,” DeVito continued, “and finally, I asked her for her phone number, and it was a Brooklyn number. So that cinched it, right there.”
At a time when there was a lot of emphasis on stereotypical ideas of looking good, the short actor and the tall actress made sure that nothing came in the way of their relationship and careers. They married in January 1982. In the time they were together, they also had three children together: Lucy, Grace, and Jacob.
They have worked together many times over the years, including on his classic TV show Taxi and the 1996 family film Matilda, in which they played a married couple.