Her sister-in-law was furious with her and told her that she has to learn to live with the fact that the other woman was their family.
It takes one a lot of strength and perseverance to forgive a disloyal partner and give the relationship another chance. People who do that deserve the undivided love and respect of their partners for all their life. However, when the partner or their family still goes on to disrespect them, the feeling could be mortifying.
A wife shared a similar experience on Reddit and asked other users if she is being unreasonable for getting humiliated by her in-laws.
She revealed that her husband cheated on her two years into the marriage and also has a son from the other woman. She was gracious enough to forgive her husband and also accept their son. But she recently saw that her in-laws have included the other woman's photo in their family portrait and hung it in their living room. This made her upset and she wants to know if she is right in feeling so.
In her post, the wife explained that the fling was a "drunken one-time thing" with his work colleague, and he said they both regretted it.
"We were having a rough patch in our relationship at that time, because of the stress of being unable to conceive, so I tried to understand him and gave our relationship another chance," she explained.
She added, "I was gutted when he later told me that Madison was pregnant, but what’s done was done and the only thing I could do was accept it. They now have a son, Kit. Kyle’s parents adore Kit and they have him once a week every Friday. I don’t begrudge them for that and I myself care about Kit like a stepson because none of any of this is his fault."
However, her heart broke when she saw a photo of Madison (her stepson's mom) in their family portrait. "For Mother’s Day my FIL [father-in-law] had an artist draw a Disney-style family portrait of their family. My MIL sent a picture of the portrait that they put in the living room of their house. My parents in law are in the middle, and to their left is Kyle’s sister Karla."
"Beside Karla is her husband and in front of them are their two kids. To their right is me, beside me is Kyle, and beside Kyle is Madison. Kit is in front of Kyle. My heart sank when I saw Madison. I have nothing against Kit being in the picture and I know that they my in laws are close to Madison too, but to have her in the portrait with Kyle between me and her… that just broke my heart."
She tried to reason it out with her mother-in-law and she was apologetic. "My MIL apologized for hurting my feelings but said that they didn’t mean to upset me, they were just thinking of Kit and how they don’t want him to feel that her mother isn’t family to them," she revealed. "My MIL said that she will put the portrait in their bedroom instead. I told her that frankly I don’t know how they didn’t think that it would upset me, but if they move the portrait elsewhere then I accept their apology and that’s the end of the issue for me."
However, her sister-in-law was furious because her complaining about the photo made her in-laws upset. "Karla said I was out of line for telling my in laws what they can or cannot put in their living room, and that in reality Madison is part of their family because she is Kit’s mom. She said that I should learn to live with the fact that Madison will always be there as long as I’m married to Kyle because of Kit. I told her that I know Madison will always be there, but is it too much to ask them not to rub it in my face with a portrait showing my husband between me and Madison?"
Apart from a couple of people who blames the wife, most other commenters supported her.
"You should consider leaving your husband," someone wrote in. "You’re never going to be free from the reminder of his infidelities. Either accept it, all of it, or get a divorce. You can’t expect the rest of the family to walk on eggshells because your husband betrayed everything marriage is supposed to stand for."
In an update to her post, she expressed regret about posting her story in the first place because the responses added toxicity to her life, she said.
"There are comments that made me realize many things, but most just jump into conclusions and talk like they know things better than I do and everyone including me who don't agree with them is wrong," she wrote. "I already have enough toxicity in my life, I don't need more, thanks."
What do you think?